Tuesday, 2 December 2008

A Christmas Poem

Christmas comes but once a year.....
And Santa should be shot!
His reindeers served with red wine sauce,
Not one....the bloody lot!
And at the bottom of our chimney,
I’ll place some broken glass,
So jolly, happy Santa
Will lacerate his ass.
Yes, I will strive to put a stop
To his annoying “Ho! Ho! Ho!”
Because I hate the big, fat hairy get,
And all the world shall know.
But in keeping with tradition,
And by the fireside,
I’ll still place, oh so lovingly -
- But laced with cyanide,
A little glass of sherry
And a booby-trapped mince pie,
So upon his initial nibble,
It will blow up in his eye.
And to double my pleasure…two for one,
I’ll electrify my roof,
And frazzle Rudolph and his mates,
With the slightest touch of hoof.
As the power surge flickers the neighbour’s lights,
I’ll gleefully leap and bound
And marvel at the clanking noise
As their antlers hit the ground!!!

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