Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Sarah Jessica Parker Avoids Fallout.

One was fingering one's mouse the other day, while waiting for my faithful houseboy, Chu Me, to light the fire in one's private office, when one came across an article on the glorious gossip-fest that is Closer Online.

It appears that Sarah Jessica Parker had a spot of bother at a recent red carpet affair (poppets will know Sarah from 'Sex in the City'. She's the one who has an air of Nosferatu about her but with hair and a better dental regime).

Wearing a fabulous hot pink jaquard-style mini dress, she arrived at the red carpet parade for Did you hear about the Morgans? in Leicester Square and, while standing next to the mouth-watering Hugh Grant, persisted in yanking down of her hem and hoisting up her busty plateau.

At one point, Hugh almost appeared to be holding up her dress, as his hand slid round her back toward her zip during a photo opportunity (Honestly! He's shameless!)

One is quite sure her dilemma could have easily been averted with a little forward planning, some magic tape and a pre-extravaganza exfoliation. Ladies know that, without a good scrub, rough skin can act like little kittens claws and drag fabric any which way it pleases.

Anyhoo ... a valuable lesson learnt by Miss Parker and, though her fashion fixation may occasionally suffer unexpectedly, Crusty believes she is fortunate, in that she will never know the pain of losing her looks.


  1. Are you saying that SJP's bust is covered by hard skin? This has destroyed many of my finest equine fantasies.

  2. I'm unsure, poppet. On relection, one suspects the hem was wriggling up because there's not a picking on her thigh region.

    As for the bustal drop, one believes post- childbirth saggage was responsible, with inadequate cuplift. It's a lady's cross to bear. One imagines hunky, testosterone-pumped man-specimens, like yourself, would be unaware of it.

    One trusts you and yours are well and giddy with glee at the approaching festive season?