Saturday, 6 February 2010

Weather Forecasts and Mono-brows.

One was dipping one’s bejewelled slipper into the twitterverse last night and enjoying a terrific tweetfest with one’s twitterchums.

Reclined on the sofa, in the warmth of the Drawing Room and tweeting merrily away with one’s good friend, NikkiG, one’s eyes were mysteriously drawn past the screen of one’s laptop.

It was there that one saw BBC weatherman Rob McElwee on one’s 32 incher.

One watched and listened, politely, to his forecast for the duration; he certainly has a soft and gentle vocal delivery. However, regardless of his warming tones and smart appearance, can one really be expected to accept the weather predictions of a man with a mono-brow?

Further more, after two and half minutes, one was not at all comfortable with the way his left hand was fondling Lands End.

It was only last month that the exquisite boys and girls at Attitude towers had provided us with an insight into the delicious Tomasz Schafernaker – adorned, on the cover of their Attitude Active supplement, in only a pair of short, black Aussi Bums, with his rippling six pack hovering above the waistband and his pectorals protruding from their taught epidermal terrain like a muscled mountain range (Chu Me! A glass of iced water and one’s fan, dear! ... Hurry!)

Every time one now sees a towering cumulus one thinks of dear Tomasz fondly (sigh).

Anyhoo …though poor Rob may not posses the smouldering deliciousness of his colleague, one feels a little attention to detail is essential. Predominantly, a small and painless waxing of his browal border to improve his facial fancy.

Crusty can then, and only then, hold him in higher regard and, quite frankly, he can fondle any part of our nation how so ever he pleases.

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